"You wreck your own life, and then, very gently, you wreck the lives of those around you"

books:


	• The End of the World as We Know It: Scenes from a Life Robert Goolrick Algonquin Books, 2007 - 224 pages average customer review:based on 27 reviews view larger image
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highly recommended

So sad, but so lovely

I found it hard to put down this book. I laughed and cried while reading it, and some parts made me gasp with their emotion. Other reviewers have already commented on the author's terrible experiences with his parents, but one part that struck me was when he says, early on in the book, that he wishes that everyone could be a part of his family. He is at a funeral when he has this thought, and he is recalling the good memories of his extended family, much of whom he adored (aunts, a grandmother). The author experienced wonderful childhood moments and had good people with him at times.
Of course, what his parents did is unforgiveable and ultimately leaves him wounded and messed up for life. I just wanted to add that I think that the sweet childhood memories are just as beautifully written and poignant as the sad and terrible ones. Nostalgia is sad.

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Survival story, one less victim hiding behind a facade

This book is and an easy read. Following Mr. Goolrick's journey it is hard to understand how someone can heal from the horrific trials of a wounded childhood; yet bringing the secrets out of their hiding places begins the process of healing. Hopefully, many other survivors of 'painful parenting' will find this book and rip their own secrets wide open.

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Tolstoy was right, I guess....

"Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way." Robert Goolrick's memoir is a stunning acknowledgement of Tolstoy's view.

I've been reading a lot of memoirs lately, mostly by people in the "baby boomer" age. Most have been very good. And, all have concentrated on the parent-child connection, or, in some cases, the lack of connection. After finishing each book, I'm reminded of the scene in the movie "In and Out", where Emily, the character played by Joan Cusack, screams out, "Is EVERYBODY [..]?!". I want to yell, "Did EVERYBODY have rotten childhoods!?"

But of all the "rotten childhoods" depicted in the latest rash of memoirs, no one had it rougher than young Robert Goolrick. Sexually assaulted at the age of four by his drunken father, the attack was hushed by his mother and grandmother. Goolrick hints at more attacks by his father.

Robert grows up bi-sexual, unable to sustain a relationship with either sex. His parents, by their cruel,on-going, thoughless, drunken actions, had ruined their child's life.

Not everyone should be a parent; clearly the Goolrick couple shouldn't have had pets, let alone human children.

The book is beautifully written.

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"You wreck your own life, and then, very gently, you wreck the lives of those around you"

aptly proclaims Goolrick's alcoholic mother in this edgy memoir of a life of innocence interrupted. One wonders at the reasoning behind the telling of this despairing tale of alcoholism, depression, cutting, and inability to connect with others in deep and meaningful ways. Goolrick claims that it is to prevent the same thing from happening to another, yet really bad guys seem unlikely to transform into good guys as a result of reading a book. That being said, the guy can write: a brutally honest story about an ordinary young life gone extraordinarily wrong. Similarly-themed: A Million Little Pieces by James Frey, A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius by Dave Eggers, and Driving with Dead People by Monica Holloway, which should be chosen in favor of the poorly-written Broken by William Cope Moyers and Katherine Ketcham.

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You have to be ready for this one

This book grabs you and won't let go. Prepare to be emotionally touched. Very thought provoking about one's own childhood as well as others.

reviews: 1, 2, 3, page 4, 5, 6

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