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How to Survive Your Boyfriend's Divorce: Loving Your Separated Man without Losing Your Mind
Robyn Todd

M. Evans and Company, Inc., 2000 - 96 pages

average customer review:based on 37 reviews
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   highly recommended  highly recommended






I'm Not Alone!

My boyfriend and I had just begun the "putting it on hold" process when I bought this book, and although I knew it was the right thing to do, I wasn't sure why I couldn't "fix things" myself without a break. Now I know that I am not alone, and that even being a Cindy Crawford/Mother Theresa combo won't help me get through these difficult times, or make the process go any faster. Like the majority of women who read this book, I too, believed that love could conquer all, and was surprised to find the relationship with my recently-separated boyfriend floundering despite the love that existed. This book truly dropped out of the sky at the right moment for me, reaffirming our decision to take a break, and suggesting many alternatives to help us move forward in the future. I have never been a big self-help reader, but I would encourage anyone even remotely considering purchasing this book to do so. It was worth every penny and triple that! I am on my third read-through and am absorbing more, and in the process, becoming a stronger person AND a stronger partner each time! Thanks so much to the authors for their much-needed work!


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Extremely helpful

I found this book to be informative. Where was it 3 years ago? they man I have been dating for almost 3 years gave me excuse and excuse. He knew how to get to me. Well, no more. I felt alone and confused. After reading this book, I feel I have the power and he doesn't really have any say. I shouldn't have to make sacrifices. I'm in charge. I have to love myself first. I'm not a convenient store when he has the time to see me. Robyn, your book is a God send. I didn't know there are many other women like me and felt I was doing something wrong. Thanks, I feel better about myself. I deserve more and better. Until he realizes that, then I'm gonna go on with my life. When he's ready, fine. I've made too many excuses for him, no more. This book made me think twice and says to love myself first. I'm first, not him. He can't put me first so tough luck. No more waiting, I'm a free woman now. I wish I had the courage back then. I rather be alone than unhappy as he made me unhappy. NO MORE! Thanks again. To all women, you are in charge of your life, not them. Put yourself first.


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What a godsend!

This book is a godsend! Dropped right into my lap, the perfect bookd at the perfect time. One of the chapters, "We're stuck! Now what?" perfectly described my current situation and the practical advice provided by the authors has helped pushed our relationship and the pending divorce along. The advice has also strengthened the relationship, as I have shared antecdotes from the book with my boyfriend. He's glad that I have this book as a resource as much as I am.






Separation is a different state...

Separation is not quite married, not quite single, not quite divorced. It is chaos, often when you least expect it. A relationship during this time is certainly not an affair, but it is not just standard dating either (as you probably now know ). I have found no other book that recognizes this and therefore is so helpful.

You're probably wondering how helpful and why was it so helpful? I would've paid many times more the price of this book for just half of the chapter which I read and reread, photocopied, marked up, and where I found myself. As cliche as it may sound, this book was a bright light in a very dark time. It does not matter what the page numbers were, I suspect that if you're drawn to this title you may very well find such a similar passage about a relationship. I'm not surprised to hear that many people purchase a second copy for the other person in the relationship.

As you may have suspected I was the man trying to survive my girlfriend's divorce. This book works in either case. (Actually, she was also trying to survive mine.) It has been slightly more than a year since I started reading this book and we're still together because of it.

Why only four stars? At the end of each chapter the book reminds you that you have three options: I can stay in the relationship, I can put it on hold, or I can leave. In my opinion the book did not provide enough information or examples for putting the relationship on hold. My other reason is that this is a perfect book for people to add their stories on the Web, but there's no complementary website.

So to the authors: thank-you! This book was a very important part of last 12 months of my life. I hope the next edition has twice as many case studies.


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Wow....

A great book for women who are needing help with this dilema. I was so consumed by all the points and feelings that hit so close to home, I was able to read it in one sitting. This is a no nonsense book, and is a must read for any woman in this situation! I am really glad that I got this book. I am sure it will come in to play and comfort me a number of times for me in the upcoming months.


reviews: 1, 2, 3, 4, page 5, 6, 7, 8



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