If you want a book to change the way you see the world...

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	• The Rantings of a Single Male: Losing Patience with Feminism, Political Correctness... and Basically ... Thomas Ellis Rannenberg Publishing, 2005 - 268 pages average customer review:based on 53 reviews view larger image
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highly recommended

If you want a book to change the way you see the world...

Overall, I adored this book. It was a fast read-I could not put it down. Tom is a good writer, funny, well-phrased, hard-hitting, and interesting. It was not an easy read however. As a woman I got quite a few proverbial slaps upside the head-many of the things he said hit far too close to home. Some hit home and made me laugh, particularly the references to taming animals. Most hit home and made me cringe, as I recalled how I had behaved the same way as the women in his book without realizing how it made the men in my life feel. Or worse yet, how I still think or act despite my best intentions.
So, onto the intro.
The intro is very well written. Tom lays out his reasons for writing the book, what he hopes to accomplish, and what his intended audience is. What made me sad, after speaking with Tom in person at the Men's Rights Congress 2005 in DC , was his line "I'd say the main reason I felt compelled to write an entire book is that I have rarely been listened to by women. At least not for more than about 15 seconds at a time. " Here is a man with a lot to say, and it is a shame that no woman has bothered to listen. Listening to men IS a deficiency in many women. The irony is that we pride ourselves on communication. We should amend that to the talking part of communication only.

This was just one of the raw nerves he hit, just in his introduction. As I said, this was not an easy book for me to read.

I challenge any woman to read this book. It will take strength; you must lay aside your ego, you must shut off your defensiveness and ignore everything you have been taught or have learned over the years. I promise if you do, if you read this book without preconcieved notions, it will change you, in some seriously wonderful ways. And every man in your life will notice.

Thank you, Tom, for giving me such a naked and provocative look into the male mind, and into my own.

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This book is a must read

When I was young, naive and idealistic I was almost sold on the feminist agenda. Somehow, something did not feel quite right, but I persevered. Men oppress women. OK I'll just discover how men do that, and I won't do those same things. Equality, it sounded really good, yeah I'll support that. Men need to get in touch with their feminine side. OK I'll learn how to do that.

Over the years, there have been many authors that I have read on sex issues and in particular issues faced by men. Each in its own way contributed to increasing my level of knowledge and understanding.

Recently I discovered a book I wish had been written many years ago. The Rantings of a Single Male by Thomas Ellis. It is a book which needed to be written. I found his writing style very easy to read. The reason the book struck a strong chord with me is, that this bloke in writing about his life, also wrote about many of the things that I also had experienced or thought about. Like Tom I had experienced one disastrous relationship after another. Except, instead of my girlfriends being into feminism, it was I who was into feminism. Like Tom, I was also searching for answers.

"No longer will I strain myself trying to divine what a woman's expectations are so that I can meet them."

Like Tom, I had spent most of my life trying to do that. Little did I realise what a fruitless, thankless and unachievable goal it was.

Petra is a woman who keeps re-emerging throughout Tom's book. Petra is the person who introduces Tom to feminism and tries to indoctrinate him into feminism. Initially Tom views feminism as a harmless fad. The book documents Tom's journey through life and the impact that feminism had on his life and relationships.

"After going through her stack of books, I realized that it wasn't just Petra's illogical babblings I had a problem with. The whole women's movement had something bogus about it."

As Tom writes about his experiences with women, there are areas in the book which has parallels in the `The Manipulated Man' by Esther Vilar. She writes about how women train and condition men like Pavlov's dog, using sex as a form of reward and punishment. This is very clear in Tom's book where feminist Petra rewards him when he agrees with her and punishes him when he disagrees.

Throughout the book there are gems of insight and understanding. Most of us blokes do not know what the world was like before feminism. What male and female relationships were like? Was it Utopia? Women have always been angry at men and feminism just enabled them to refine it into a science.

"Even before the rise of feminism, women used a combination of male validation and male-bashing to boost their self-worth. Feminism has just emphasized the male-bashing part."

Feminists do not want a men's rights movement, even more importantly they do not want books like this one to be written. They do not want challenges to their opinions or men's ideas to be expressed, hence it is necessary to suppress men's opinion and points of views. Their attempts by the various Offices of Women, to make it a criminal offence to challenge feminist ideology or to express opinions which contradict their own.

"When they call you a `woman hater' they mean `how dare you disagree with me? Don't bother getting upset. Why waste the energy?' It is really only a part of women's anger strategy to get men to back down.

What needs to happen? The author provides some suggestions like a government office for the status of men, perhaps even university 'Men's Studies' courses that do not come under the umbrella of women's studies faculties.

If you only ever read one book in your life, then this is the book to read. I'll be saving this book for my son to read. I believe that this is the most important book I have ever read.

"In the end it's women `who just don't get it".

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Tells it like it is

Helluva good read.

All men should read it.

every guy should seriously check this out. . .

I thought I was already aware of misandry and a lot of games women play, but this book showed me I didn't even know the half of it.

This was truly an eye-opener. You'll never look at the women in your life the same way again.

Where few men dare tread

I would love to give the book 5 stars just because this kind of writing is so overdue and takes a great deal of fortitude to write. Tom Ellis is like an unbridled Warren Farrell for the common man. As he says in the intro, he has nothing to prove. The one place where he does fall short is that some of the criticism he fires at women is pretty much the male version of the nonesense that male bashers fire at men. Also, when he digresses into anecdotes about the neurosis of women, I can't help but think how my female friends could tell just as many tales about whacky, disfunctional men they have known. I don't know which gender is crazier, all I can say is that one of us is running a damn close second. Its a photo finish all the way. Nonetheless, as someone who is fed up with male bashing and the way the media and our culture demeans and berates masculinity, I can understand his anger and bias, and read past it. God knows I understand it.
The book is a great read. For a long time men have been silent about putting up with lots of crap from cafeteria style feminists who pick and choose to be the "empowered" woman one moment, then switch to the helpless little girl the next- with no respect or care for how this impacts the men in their lives. It only seems to matter which role is most expedient and convenient for them to play at the time. And as he points out, George Orwell has nothing on these feminists when it comes to double speak. We have now raised a couple of generations of women to feel that a selfish sense of entitlement is justified, and that their self esteem is all important. By extension, many of them look to men for constant validation of this, and if they don't get it, then they feel the men are to blame. I would refer readers to "The War Against Boys" by Christina Hoff Sommers to see how this sort of brain washing is being institutionalized in our schools. But perhaps the worst part of all this is the way men are brain washed with the old chiche that they must "take it like a man". In other words, if they complain about any of this, they are considered wimps. Just the opposite is true. What is so manly about putting up with all of this. And that takes me back to my original thought of this book being so needed and overdue. For a long time I thought I was the only guy that noticed how TV shows and commercials made men look like dummies and women like goddesses, or that I was the only one bothered by the fact that every other comedy film featured guys geeting whacked in the testicles- always to the chorus of female laughter from the audience. I thought perhaps I must be "over sensitve" if I am bothered by all of this, yet if I don't tell my girl friend exactly what she wants to hear, then I am an "insensitive male." It is so refreshing that Ellis gives voice to all of these realities for men. And yes, I too have to agree with him that the vast majority of women I have met are not The Great Communicators that our culture makes them out to be. In fact most are lousy listners- except of course when it comes to hearing the things that they want to hear. And of those things we men are told we don't say enough, or that when we do, it is never sincere. Perhaps if women read this book (it won't be easy for most) then they can appreciate how guys feel that they just can't in, no matter what we say or do. This book is right on target on most of these issues

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reviews: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, page 7, 8, 9, 10, 11

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