Polar Express it isn't!

books:


	• The Worst Noel: Hellish Holiday Tales Collected Authors Of The Worst Noel HarperCollins, 2005 - 224 pages view larger image
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Christmas!!?? Oy vey!!

Yes, as you might guess from the title, this book is mildly amusing in spots. But then a leopard is coal black in spots, too.

Most of the essays are written by Jewish females who tend to be too arch and clever by half for their own good, and who seem to think that cynicism and pseudo-sophistication are funny in and of themselves. Often, they're not.

Do the essays capture some of the frustrations and imperfections that accompan our biggest holiday? Yes, definitely. But do they, as a whole, also show the beauty and majesty of the Christmas season, of what The Day is really all about? I think not. All too often the writing sounds like the whining of spoiled suburban kids who have had far too much handed to them free gratis in their lives.

If many of the writers are from families who found themselves caught awkwardly between their Jewish heritage and the national peer pressure to participate in the Yuletide -- well, it's part of the fate of minorities to sometimes feel out of step. Get over it.

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Polar Express it isn't!

This is a book for the people who no longer hear the ring of the bell -- but if you're in that category (or are just generally fatigued by holiday cheer), then this is for you. The 18 short stories very in quality but, overall, they reflect bright writing about sometimes depressing holiday happenings. Leave it in your bathroom at your holiday party and group your guests by their reactions as they leave. Those with a sense of humor about the holidays will be amused. Those without (perhaps some of the reviewers here) could be upset.

reviews: page 1, 2

Does the thought of mistletoe give you hives?
Does the sound of jingling bells
instill fear in your heart?
Do you hide under the covers from the day after
Thanksgiving till New Year's Day?
And even if you love Christmas, do the
hyperconsumerism, overindulgence, and
tinsel-covered everything make you crazy?

If you said yes to any of these questions, this is the book for you. You are not alone. Everyone has a Christmas-nightmare story to tell. Some of the best writers around have gone through some of the worst Christmases ever. Their tales of holly-draped horror are gathered here for your amusement, from NEAL POLLACK's Christmas-ham disaster to the accidental Santahood of JONI RODGERS to BINNIE KIRSHENBAUM's receiving what may be the worst gift ever given. And Stanley Bing gives us a peek at the lonely guy's Xmas feast. All this, plus many more recollections of Worst Noels past.

So pour yourself a glass of eggnog, chisel off a piece of rock-hard fruitcake, and curl up in the big comfy chair by the fireplace where the stockings have been hung with such care -- and settle in to read The Worst Noel.

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