Many wonderful parts, but not about babies

books:


	• Becoming the Parent You Want To Be: A Sourcebook of Strategies for the First Five Years Laura Davis Broadway, 1997 - 448 pages average customer review:based on 23 reviews view larger image
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highly recommended

interesting read

This book can be refreshing to read, fun, informative and even personal. It makes you think about you and your child rather than giving you advice how to be perfect. It is nice that families of different ethnic origin are pictured - it makes the world more round and gives a clear message. It's readable for specific topics or chapter after chapter, you don't need to know the last few sequences to understand the one that really interests you. Two thumbs up for 'Becoming the parent you want to be'.

Many wonderful parts, but not about babies

I am both a lactation consultant and a mental health counselor with families and children. I love this book, and suggest it all the time - with one very strong caveat. Despite the depth of sensitivity and understanding the authors have for preschoolers and older toddlers, they miss the boat about babies. As other reviewers have said, their views for younger children reflect a lack of understanding of the newest knowledge about the neuroscience of development (even the knowledge we had when the book was first published a while ago). Particularly problematic are the areas on early feeding and sleep. Better books include the popular books by William and Martha Sears, and Elizabeth Pantley's books, especially her book on sleep.

I'd like to take a minute to contradict the reviewer who alleged that following the methods in this book would result in "bratty" children. Other than the problems noted above, this book does a great job helping parents to incorporate the best that modern science knows about how to raise kids. When kids learn how to understand themselves and the world around them, they have self control. Sure, this means that sometimes you have to take the time to stop and explore their feelings and the world with them. It's more work early on, and few adults were raised this way. That doesn't mean it doesn't work better. Later, kids raised like this stand out because of their sensitivity to themselves and others. They know how to take care of themselves, and they know how to be kind.

This is a great "how to" book - parents can flip to a section about the problem they are facing and get tailored information about that problem. It goes very well with other books about emotion coaching and understanding your own process as a parent, such as: Parenting From the Inside Out by Siegel & Hartzel, John Gottman's books, even the classic How To Talk/How to Listen.

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Informative, useful book for all parents

This is a wonderful book. It's full of useful information. The authors are open and accepting of a variety of parenting practices and styles. The aim really seems to be about helping parents figure out what strategies make sense for their children, their families, and their values. The book does tend to read like a textbook, and it is very long, but I think it makes a wonderful resource book to refer to when parenting challenges arise.

reviews: page 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

Informative, inspiring, and enlightening, Becoming the Parent You Want to Be provides parents with the building blocks they need to discover their own parenting philosophy and develop effective parenting strategies. Through in-depth information, practical suggestions, and many lively first-person stories, the authors address the many dilemmas and joys that the parent of young children encounter and demonstrate a range of solutions to the major issues that arise in the raising of babies, toddlers and preschoolers. Full of warmth, clarity, humor, and respect, Becoming the Parent You Want to Be gives parents permission to be human: to question, to learn, to make mistakes, to struggle and to grow, and, most of all, to have fun with their children.

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