An Indispensible Guide on a Subject that Receives little Attention

books:


	• Queen Bees and Wannabees Rosalind Wiseman Piatkus Books, 2003 - 352 pages average customer review:based on 3 reviews view larger image
	for more information click here

An Indispensible Guide on a Subject that Receives little Attention

This book is about the friendships and social circles of girls aged roughly 10-15, with most of the focus on the "cliques" they so famously form, describing the roles girls commonly play in the them (Queen Bee, etc). The author has extensive experience dealing with girls this age at her job and runs workshops for schools. It's a very hands on, practical account.

She argues that while girl's cliques may seem trivial or unimportant to adults, girls are actually learning how to interact with others socially at this age, and for better or for worse, how they behave and respect themselves as adults will often mirror how they fit in with their peers at this sensitive age.

This can be a touchy subject for some. I'm a teacher, and I love kids, and I like all of the ones I deal with, whether they fit as "Queen Bees", "Wannabes" "Floaters" or any other little label.

But still, I think as adults we tend to idealize kids, see the cute and innocent qualities, and tend to turn a bit of a blind eye to the politics between friends, and sometimes even to the attitudes of our students toward class outcasts. As adults, the way they behave can seem quaint, but for the kids themselves, grades 6-8 can be a hard time socially, and it doesn't make it any easier if teachers just turn a blind eye to it and shrug it off thinking "they'll grow out of it".

On the flipside, I think adults that had a hard time during these grades themselves tend to want to brush it aside as "that was then, now I'm all grown-up, and I realize how silly all that was, and one day my daughter/students will too". As nice as that feels to say as an adult, it might not be very helpful to a 12-year-old who'll have to deal with school as her reality for 6 more years.

Finally, a complaint I've heard about this book is that while it presents a depressing reality at times, it doesn't give much advice on what parents and educators can do (Unless you want to get preachy and have private "talks" with them where you talk about their feelings. Most kids reaction: "EEEWWW!!")

I can't speak as a parent of a girl this age yet, but speaking as a teacher, what I've come to realize since I read this is that while you can't always cram everything you know and think down your students throats, sometimes just knowing what's going on and having an objective view of it can help you build a healthy classroom where everyone is appreciated and respected- the popular kids as well as the loners.

For example, the author describes how when the popular girl in a fifth grade class gets paired up with a fat unpopular girl and has to hold her hand during a game in gym class, she feins digust and how all the other kids laugh. A lot of teachers blow this off as kids being kids and ignore it, but if your read this book you'll have a clearer idea of whats going on, and the pecking order that makes it allowable.

I can't claim my classes are little social utopias now, with every kid and group in perfect harmony, but I CAN say that in the time since I've read this book, those types of situations happen much less if at all. The popular kids are still popular, but while I don't come right out with it and try to preach, subtly through the first few months there are different expectations on them about what makes a good person and what kind of attitudes will make them accepted and respected. The kids get along better, aren't embarrassed about being in other groups for work (Even if they'd prefer being with their friends), and most importantly, the shyer and more awkward kids are more comfortable to speak and participate, and begin to get along with the others and become more accepted.

In short, the world of girls at this age is complicated and not an easy thing to deal with for anyone. But learning about it and having a clear view of it WILL help.

for more information click here

Queen Bees & Wannabees should be every teenager and parent's Bible

My first impressions of Queen bees & Wannabees by Rosalind Wiseman were, after seeing the 'Mean Girls' film. I thought it could be a fiction novel in the same witty vain as 'Confessions Of A Teenage Drama Queen' by Dyan Sheldon, and movie that is just as fabulous, which I both loved with Lindsay Lohan.

However, what I found to my great relief was a non-fiction book about teenage life for both girls and boys. When I found the book I instantly had an invested interest in it. However it took me at least six months to finally sit down and read it. I didn't want to rush it.

So I read 'Odd Girl Out' and it's sequel 'Odd Girl Speaks Out' by Rachel Simmons first before I got to one of my most special books I've ever read. In fact I'd really recommend these other two books as well along with this one. So it can be like a trilogy, and so very exciting to read. They are seperate books, so you don't have to do what I did and read them like a trilogy, but it helped make them all very exciting to read.

While reading I found the subject matter of great interest to me. I was really interested in knowing about the female perspective on life and this really gave me some wonderful things to look for and consider, most of which I do already, but is still worth remembering. Both sexes should make an effort to live in harmony with one another.

For years I haven't really been interested in teen films or TV shows, but all this has changed dramatically and I adore them now. Also since leaving school I can refect on the good and bad times. I've found I also have a deep interest and compassion for those in Collumbine High School and the shooting tragedy that occured April 20th 1999. Even though I wasn't there, I care about the American people and high schools. I also enjoy 'Boston Public'.

As you can see Ms. Wiseman's book has really opened up a whole new world to me I love exploring. So much so I had to email her to tell her how much I adored her book. Some of her advice could seem repetitive or just common sense, but I urge you to still read on. What she has to say does matter. I read slowly and really hung on every word. Readers who read fiction can afford not to pay so much attention to what they are reading, but not here.

I loved this book. I could write about my thoughts on it forever and never get tired. I am not a school teacher, I'm not a teacher of any sort, but I really love the subject matter in this book. I encourage anyone who has read this book to share their thoughts with me. For anyone who thinks school will never end, don't lose hope, it will. Then the rest of this wonderful world awaits. I really want to help in teenagers lives and with this book anything is possible. A book to be treasured like gold for anyone. A book worth revisiting again and again as we all live our lives the best way we know how. No one is exempt from reading this book. We are all special in our own unique way. If you've ever lost your way this book will give you hope at finding it again. Queen Bees and Wannabees is one book worth remembering. I know it is one book I'll never forget.

for more information click here

Proceed full speed ahead

Every mother and/or father of a preteen/teenage girl or boy should read this book. Not only to identify your child but to get a better understanding of who his/her friends/peers are and how their actions affect your child. There are several useful tools provided to help you communicate better with your child and tips on what language you should not use when talking to your son or daughter. There are also chapters in this book that should be shared with your child. A great book!

hot

not?

What's your opinion?

Write a review and share your thoughts!

recommendations

Inspirational Books for Women, Young Adult Females, and Teens
Books for Catholic Parents of School Aged Children
Helpful Books About the Social Lives of Kids
Recommended Reading for Parents
The Best "Escape" Books EVER

bees

Queen Bees and Wannabees
Bee Season: A Novel
Queen Bees and Wannabes: Helping Your Daughter Survive Cliques, ...
Are You a Bee? (Backyard Books)
The Bee Tree

search for books
queen bees, bees, queen, wannabees

Impressum / about us