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What Is This Thing Called Love?
William Glasser M.D.

William Glasser MD, 2000 - 164 pages

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Teasing out the basis for a loving relationship

The word "love" is so bandied about so much that even to use it in the title of a book can leave the reader feeling a little uneasy. Would a book called, "What is this thing called Love?" treat the most sought-after of all human experiences as an academic commodity? Would love, whatever it is, become a series of clinical concepts? Worse still, would the pages unfold as a litany of trite platitudes? Much as I admire the writings of Dr. Glasser, I began to read with certain trepidation. How would he approach a topic that in my opinion reaches beyond the realms of psychology? As if these doubts were not enough I found it somewhat daunting to note that the subtitle proclaimed it as a book for the "Single Woman". I was neither single nor female!

The book opens with a dialogue between Ann and Mark as they try to understand one another and the relationship between them. Dr. Glasser then explains how he got to know Ann and how they agreed to have conversations about the nature of love. And that is what this book is all about, those conversations. It is not therapy although the author and Ann soon reach a level of communication that is common to all good therapy. Glasser does use his extensive experience as a psychotherapist to help this young lady teacher clarify what is going on in her life. Most important of all he listens, he listens very carefully. In a sense this is action research where we are able to witness real people twist and turn as they tease out a living definition of the way they share their lives. There are no smart answers, no smart fixes, no attempt to say this is the way it should be for everyone in the universe.

As I read these pages, and I would have to admit that it was not always an easy read since it dealt with live human experience, I found myself doing a lot of thinking, not about ideas or guidelines but about the living out of love in my own life. That is probably the strongest point of this book. It is certainly not a piece of light reading nor an agony aunt's quick fix. This book was a journey for those who appear on its pages. I believe it becomes a journey for those who read it ... even men!


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This is the essential book for the Single Woman: You are a competent, caring, sensual woman who wants to love and be loved. What you want from life is not unreasonable: A happy marriage, a loving family, good friends and a comfortable home. You don't need rules, therapy or sexual advice; there is nothing wrong with you or what you want.

You are in, or have been in, an intimate relationship. You've told men, I love you, and been told, I love you, by men. But whatever you believe love is, doesn't seem to be the same for the men you know. This book offers you a new, empowering way to look at love. A way that will help you to avoid mistakes and to recognize the right man when he comes along.


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