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Why Did I Marry You Anyway? 12.5 Strategies for a Happy Marriage (And the Mythinformation That Gets in the ...
Barbara Bartlein

Cumberland House Publishing, 2003 - 320 pages

average customer review:based on 15 reviews
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   highly recommended  highly recommended





I can't believe my husband enjoyed it with me.

While on a long car trip, my husband notice me reading Barbara Barlein's Why Did I Marry You Anyway? To help pass the time, he suggested I read it aloud. I was amazed at his interest and his desire for me to stop and discuss passages with him. He even stated that he was getting a lot out of it. Many issues we had never discussed came to the fore and were patiently worked out. I was very impressed, not only with the material presented in this book, but in the fun way it was presented and the ease that it could be used as a basis for good discussion.


Laughing Out Loud in Doctor's Office

Married just under two months, I found myself laughing out loud in the doctor's office and waking my husband from his sleep to share the laughter of Charlie Oatmeal's latest tomfoolery. This book has two outstanding qualities: it's real and it's funny. Barbara Bartlein forces us to step down from our high horses and take a look in the mirror in a way that isn't threatening. She's genuine in admitting her own guilt and struggle every step of the way. Secondly, if she doesn't make you laugh, her husband certainly will. I felt a deep connection not only with Bartlein and her husband, but with all married couples. It has provoked countless discussions between my husband and I and inspired me to let things roll off my back and keep things in their proper perspective. It's easy to pick up and tough to set down- a book I'm certainly going to keep around for when the laundry pile is higher and the load a bit heavier. There's something in this book for everyone! You'll find yourself shaking your head often.


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Amazingly down to earth book for strengthening a marriage

Reviewed by Olivera Baumgartner-Jackson for Reader Views (12/07)

My usual reaction to this kind of self-help book is somewhere along the lines of, "And exactly what does he/she thinks he/she knows about MY marriage?" More often than not, I either find them all too preachy or too simplistic to help me solve any particular problems I might have encountered in my personal life, so they end up in a book swap meeting or a book swap site. Ms. Bartlein's "Why Did I Marry You Anyway?" seemed to be different from the very start and after I read it, I immediately found a permanent place for it in my collection.

My attention was first caught by title - "Why Did I Marry You Anyway?" By the time I read the subtitle, "Overcoming the Myths That Hinder a Happy Marriage," I was definitely intrigued. If you are married and if you are totally honest with yourself, I bet there were times in your life when you asked yourself the exact same question. There are moments when we are not so sure that we made the right decision or simply moments when we look at our beloved partner and have to wonder where in the world - or even the outer realm - did this particular behavior came from and what did the person in front of us do with our normally sweet husband and wife.

Ms. Bartlein cleverly touches on most common problem areas in a marriage; such as money, sex, children, annoying personal habits, in-laws, lack of shared interests and more. Offering tools for recognition of issues as well as the resolution of them, each chapter includes real-life examples, absolutely hilarious quotes and thought-provoking myths that could potentially harm your relationship. Unlike most other books, the examples and patterns listed by Ms. Bartlein definitely made me pay attention and I had to admit that - oh wonder of wonders! - I was not perfect and that I was actually guilty of several quite distinct behavioral patterns. Which ones? Well, I am definitely a stamp collector - but if you want to find out what that means in terms of marriage, you'll have to get the book and read it for yourself. It is most probably NOT what you are imagining right now...

I found Barbara Bartlein's "Why Did I Marry You Anyway?" a very informative and down-to-Earth guide to improving a marriage; and as such I would highly recommend it to anybody who sincerely desires a happy relationship with their spouse. Just leave it on the table and see how quickly he - or she - will react to the title... Joking aside, this is truly a keeper; and a book that might well improve other aspects of your life besides your marriage.




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Marriage Improvement

I read this book in one day and laughed out loud hundreds of times. I enjoyed the author's comments about her husband and raising her kids. She is an experienced marriage counselor and she tells her observations in general, along with stories of clients who have asked her for help. She was very sincere and down to earth. Her advice is practical and the recommendations are ones that any man or woman can use in his or her marriage. I would recommend this book to anyone who has been married for a year or longer. Single people would not appreciate the jokes.


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Practical, practical, practical!

I would recommend this book to anyone looking for quick tips to make marriage easier. It's a quick read, and really gets to the point quickly. The tips provided are realistic and easy to implement. The examples in the book are practical though not all may apply. It's simple to skip to parts that do apply to you. This author gives the impression that she is very open, honest and really wants her tips to help. I would buy this book again.


reviews: page 1, 2, 3



Movies like Sleepless in Seattle and An Affair to Remember bombard people with bad ideas?MythInformation?about love. We are told that if you meet the right person and fall in love, your marriage will thrive and you will be happy. However, while love is important, stable marriages are not based on love alone.

Barbara Bartlein has worked with hundreds of couples as they have worked to save their marriages, and she is now ready to share the secrets of what they have learned together. A happy, successful marriage almost always is the result of hard work and commitment, she says, but all too often people don?t know what to do to improve their marriages. This is where Why Did I Marry You Anyway? fills the gap. With 12.5 strategies that cover all the common problems in relationships, like money, children, sex, and in-laws, she tells couples what to do and shows them how to do it.

Each chapter follows the same outline. First, a common complaint is explored. Second, common myths that block solutions to the problem?the MythInformation?are identified and helpful ways of countering them are suggested. Third, case studies illustrate the concepts in action. Finally, quizzes and tools provide opportunities to practice these new skills and behaviors. The result is a helpful, humorous, and easy-to-read book. Anyone who gives it just a little thought will come away with practical insights that will result in positive changes in their lives.


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